Sunday, May 25, 2008

Old Friends Are The Best Friends

My best friend and her family just headed home after a overnight visit. It may sound strange that we haven't seen each other for a good part of the year, nor talked or even e-mailed much, and yet I call her my best friend. She and her family live in Boston, and we are only an hour away, but our lives are such that we don't get a chance to see each other often. Family, work, finances, stress - they all get in the way of getting together. Yes, I realize what a damn shame that is. She and I met 20+ years ago, as volunteers in a program to teach school in Africa. I loved her dry humor and no-bullshit attitude, and of all the things I experienced during my time in Africa, her friendship is one of the things I have treasured ever since. Well, her friendship and her snarkiness. I appreciate that in a person. Our early 20's were spent in Boston, working, dating, hanging out. When Dr. V. and I married, she was a bridesmaid. When she told me, long-distance, about how she looked forward to her computer crashing because that meant the cute IT guy would have to come fix it, I hoped he was as nice as he was cute. And I was so happy when that turned out to be the case. Then we moved back to Boston 10 years ago, and we got to hang out some more, and she got pregnant. She didn't have the easiest pregnancy, and I was so honored when she and her husband asked me to be at the birth of their daughter. And it was the most amazing thing I'd ever experienced, and I still get shivers when I remember that moment when their daughter was born. In the last decade, I had my daughter, and then we moved back to New England, and I had my son. Her mom died, and my dad got sick, and my sister got divorced and her brother got married. She's been through a lot, up and down and all around, and so have I - and I have no doubt we will go through more crazy times in the future. What I love about our friendship is that even though we don't see each other enough these days, I know from our history that there will be more adventures for us. When our kids are older, I fully expect there will be time to hang out, to travel, to talk. To drag her across the country in a rented R.V. or make her drive up to Montreal with me and practice badly accented-French. To disgust her with my trashy reading tastes and get more excellent book recommendations from she and her husband. To be a bad influence and talk her into a hangover and laugh so hard our old-lady pelvic floors give out. Her friendship is one of the things I'm counting on still having when I'm older. Waistline? Gone. Youthful innocence? Long gone. My best friend? Still around, thank God. ____________________________________________ Cross-posted at New England Mamas

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